i should definitely be asleep now.

A quick word before I knock out. Although, techinically I've already been to sleep tonight... But my phone rang and I was woken up by someone I didn't really think would hit me up at all tonight.

Where am I at right now? In bed. Typing on the blackberry... Waiting for her call.

I'm getting kinda restless and bored of being alone. Yea,sure its all fun and games being out with the boys (and girls, for that matter) but when it comes down to it I really want that stability and comfort that I once had. Picking up on random females is fun. But that's all they are, random fun. I don't want random fun... As much as I may put forth that vibe or image, I really want to be in a healthy relationship. I contradict myself a lot, I know... I just recorded a song where I say "I aint tryina be wifed up,again"

But wow... Being alone so often gets old. Its good to a certain degree. I'm learning a lot of new things on my own... But that one special kind of friendship that is missing from this picture is definitely taking its toll on me.

I'm trying to figure out weather I miss that company of having someone there, or I just plain miss someone in particular.

For a while towards the end of the year, I was seeing someone quite often. And while it filled the void of having someone around to chill and vibe with, it never went passed that. It never felt right. There were others,too... But needless to say, the time spent just wasn't enough.

I've been in and out of relationships forever now. And I was starting to think that maybe its just time for me to be alone... Hell, I don't know. I've got a certain taste for what I like, and who it is I want. And when its not her... The ones that catch my attention ALWAYS bare similarities both physically and eventually, I learn, mentally.


Who knows.

I'll just go with the flow I guess.